Back in December I assigned a new slave task — a task that requires you to send your jetsetting Goddess on a tropical vacation to Panama! My upgraded business-class flight departs in April, and after a rested flight sipping champagne, I’ll be luxuriating on the beach for almost three weeks with My gorgeous girlfriends. Ahhhh… that’s life! MY life, that is. Hahahaha.

Many of the tasks have been checked off by now, but there are STILL a few more things left for some measly minions to handle… will it be *you*? Don’t disappoint Me — I want ALL of the tasks completed by this weekend! Get to it! Send your tributes via Green Dot, Western Union, or bank transfer. I need MY money ASAP!

Trip Expenses

• Business-class international flight: $1,350 malibu and doormat dave
• Intra-island flight: $225 doormat dave
• Extra baggage fees: $60 doormat dave
• One week in a beachfront bungalow: $970 stupid sam, a.j.
• Ten days in a luxury eco-resort: $1,500 p.t., blue balls, victor, hank the yank
• Private boat with guide: $350 derek the dunce
• Surfboard rentals: $250 mike
• Other watersports rentals: $150 tiny tim
• Rainforest tour: $100 flea
• Canal tour: $75 paul
• Island hiking guide: $90 christopher
• Taxi service: $300 asinine alan
• Wining and dining: $1,000 x-man, j.d., anonymous
• Massage: $100 anonymous
• Manicure and pedicure: $45 frankie the foot lover
• Souvenirs: $500 slave brett
• Tips for cabana boys: $60 adam ass
• Just because: AS MUCH AS YOU CAN AFFORD!